How Do I Pray

Thoughts and Tips

Prayer should not be regarded as a duty which must be performed, but rather as a privilege to be enjoyed, a rare delight that is always revealing some new beauty.
Edward McKendree Bounds

Praying is the most “physical” enactment of being with God. Praying is simple. But God is always there, always next to you, and always loving. It doesn’t matter what you do, God will always love you. At times, we may disappoint Him, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love us any less. With this marvelous love, there are things that we have to do as well, but let’s first learn how to pray.

The idea of praying regularly may seem daunting. But getting into the habit of daily prayer will bring you great rewards. You will draw closer to God, you will be able to listen to God, and you will rebalance your life by making God a priority rather than an after-thought. Through prayer, you will find peace, answers, comfort, and hope, and know the assurance of God’s love for you. (Matthew 6: 5-8)

God wants to know your thoughts. Yes, he knows where you’ve been, and he understands where you are. But, yes, he wants to hear it from you. He wants to hear from your mouth the way you would explain it. He loves to listen to what you have to say, even if it’s not right. This is prayer. God knows who we are and why we are doing this, whatever “this” is, but God wants to hear from us, particularly about why it’s important for us. (1 John 4: 7)

If you’re like me, you may want to write down what you ask for. Sometimes, God gives us answers that we may not completely understand. Sometimes the answers are not yes or no, sometimes their actions. Sometimes their actions by somebody else, and sometimes the people talking, like our friends or family, may have an idea that is similar to ours, and it may be better, or different, than our idea. But sometimes things will come to us that we don’t understand how they possibly could come, but it does. If you don’t write this down you won’t know. God does not talk to us in simple ways. It can be very complicated for us to understand, but the answer is there and we must understand it. And so, writing it down, or remembering what you asked for, may help you. (Matthew 20: 29-34)

A fact to remember, God’s time in our time is not equal. If we want something right away, it may not be available. And, if it’s not available for us then we have to wait. Is waiting a lousy thing to do? No, not always, because God may want us to learn something, something different than we already know. And through this different understanding, we may find the answer we are looking for. So, sometimes our time is not equal to God’s time. (1 Peter 5: 10-11)

Although there are many things about prayer that are true, the simplest thing is this: prayer is talking to God. There is nothing else. All these aspects of prayer, for example, location, position, and timing are just the aspects of what prayer could be for us. However, it doesn’t matter because God is enthralled with listening to us, so, push on with prayer! But prayer is talking to God. It’s just talking. So, don’t worry about what to do or how to do it, you’ll learn that as you move forward, for now, just talk to God.

Timing: You can pray in the morning, afternoon, or evening. It doesn’t matter so long as you can focus and be attentive to God’s Spirit. Many people find it helpful to begin their day in the presence of God, bringing before God the day ahead. You will find it most meaningful if you can spend at least fifteen minutes in quiet prayer, reflection, spiritual reading, and meditation.

Location: You can pray anywhere! It could be the same place in your house, or on a walk, or in the backyard, or someplace different each day. But it should be a place where you will be least distracted. (Also, recall Jesus’s teaching to “go into your inner room, close your door and pray…”. Matthew 6:6)

Position: If you have a position in which you are accustomed to praying, certainly use that. But you might try different positions during different times of prayer if for no other reason than to help your mind stay engaged. You may want to pray while walking. However, don’t let your physical position become a distraction from prayer: lying down may not be a great idea if you think you’ll fall asleep, while kneeling may not be advised for a long prayer if it means you can’t get back up again.

How to Pray: Don’t worry about doing it right. There are several approaches. Most of us are not accustomed to praying at a set time, or even many times throughout the day or for long periods.  So, to pray, sit in a comfortable chair (not too comfortable because we don’t want to fall asleep), fold your hands, close your eyes, and speak. What you speak, is your prayer. When you’re done, say “Amen”, which means you’re done. That’s it. It’s not complicated, it’s downright easy. I’m sure that you can do this, just try. (Matthew 6: 9-15)

Each individual’s prayer style is very personal, and this guide is designed to speak to each of you and will help. So, don’t feel as though you have to follow every suggestion. Use the suggestions that work for you and don’t worry about those that don’t. While it is ideal to devote at least fifteen minutes to intentional prayer, it is also meant to offer fifteen or thirty-second prayers throughout the day, when something strikes you. Think of this as a time to invest in your relationship with your loving God. Remember that you don’t have to talk the whole time you’re praying – God would like some time to speak to you as well!

Sit (or stand, or walk) quietly. Listen. Breathe. Just BE in God’s presence.
This is what prayer is.